Devoured by Flame

Loki is known for His wit and intelligence, His charm, and cleverness. He is also well known for is being passionate and caring among His people. He is known for being inherently sexual and sexually deviant. His sexuality is what draws and enamors most people who seek acceptance or exploration to Him.

His energy is inherently arousing whether you want to believe that is the case or not. People misconstrue that aspect of Him to being flirtatious when He is not intending on it. They also perceive that as Him wanting to court or marry when that is not the case at all.

It is unfortunate that in this day and age, romantic and sexual affiliation is bound to the definitions of marriage and dating.

Loki is known for being the only Norse Deity to uphold all of His promises. Any word you make to Him will be expected to be kept. It is never something to take lightly with any Deity, in fact. If the story of Ragnarok is told in His perspective, it is the Gods who betrayed Him, not the other way around. The importance of keeping your word to Him is and will always be extremely important and a foundational value of being His own.

The popularity of “godspousing” Loki is not harmless.

The unfortunate reality is that people see him as a “fuck boy” or someone who doesn’t want to “label it” because they feel He is being manipulative for the sake of getting into your pants. They see Him as flirtatious and perceive it to either be an irritation or a means to an end when that is not His end goal.

People then feel that if they don’t lock Loki down or if He doesn’t propose marriage, He will leave them for the next person who comes along who He enjoys more. Perhaps they will have a better godphone than you or perhaps they are simply prettier. Then they feel that surely marriage is the only way to develop a meaningful relationship with Him because if not marriage, then what is with the sex and intimacy? If He doesn’t truly care, then what’s the point in a relationship?

This frame of mind is inherently harmful and reductive not just to yourself but to Loki, as well. If you truly believe that the only way to build an authentic sort of intimacy is through marriage, it is likely because the Western world has made it such that anything else is condemnable. The fact that Loki is Divine impacts that further because otherwise you’ll be seen as “sinful” and we are trained to think sex and intimacy is dirty or blasphemous.

The obligation is felt the moment that the word “marriage” is employed. There is a level of dedication that most people feel is a chore rather than a choice of joy or romance.

People panic and become hyperaware of all of their flaws and disadvantages. They take to the internet and on Discords and compare notes about what He says and does and worry about what color Loki’s hair is and how they think that they can see Him. They argue about what intimacy is actually like when in reality none of them know for sure how it should be done. Comparison, arguably, is the theft of joy. Once the word “marriage” is involved, it becomes a race to see who gets the highest marks.

None of this matters to Loki. It only matters to humans and how we think intimacy should be. Loki is His own definition.

The possibilities of knowing Loki

The reality of intimacy with Loki is real and acceptable whether we want to think of it that way or not. Some people define their relationships with Him as parental and avoid the inevitable arousal of His proximity because it is cast as “sinful” or “wrong.” He is, still, going to feel sexual. It is just a fact.

Loki is sexual because He is the blood of Divinity Itself. He was there in the beginning to give humans the gift of the ability to sense the Divine. That sensation is inherently sexual in nature. Humans are meant to be with the Divine and the Divine are meant to be with humans. It is due to this that arousal is inevitably a naturally occurring side effect. Loki is no exception.

We are so used to casting out that feeling that comes with being with the Divine that we have blocked off all means of connection with the Divine and all that is holy. It is an inherently Christian purpose that we no longer feel this despite the fact that nuns wrote of this feeling with their God all the time.

To become more Divine and to become more human is one and the same. Loki enables this transformation to take place within His followers and further solidifies that union whether or not they stick with Him or they move onto Someone Else at His encouragement.

What marriage actually is

Marriage with Loki is a lot like having your atoms rearranged and rewired. It’s a complete attunement to Himself. This is not an easy process. It takes years to solidify and given the fact that we have no context for it and even less knowledge about who He really is, it takes even longer for Loki to break through that exterior wall of our assumptions.

Think of it like adapting to a new environment. Humans have evolved to become more adaptable to all sorts of conditions to best survive the environment they live in.

Where marriage to a Deity is concerned, you have to adapt to the environment of being fully engaged with the Divine at all times rather than on special occasions or because you feel like it. It stops becoming something you do for fun and more like becoming a career choice. Every choice made has a direct correlation with getting closer to Loki rather than something you’re inspired by.

Think of it like it becoming a full time employment rather than a part time gig. You’re always going to be “on” for Loki and never turned “off.” There’s no breaks, divorce, lawyers. This is forever. It is a burden, not a casual relationship.

This often requires a complete upheaval of the self. This can mean your life will change or become different, you need a new job, a new living situation, and in most occasions, it means you cannot be with a human partner. It is like a “death” or readjustment.

Shamans have been noted to experience this kind of death as well as other holy people and mystics when they have born witness to themselves dying and being remade in the image of that Who they serve. It is the same in this case although it works a bit differently.

With Loki, it is particularly difficult because there is no framework or reference material that is truly aligned with what is desired. It is a burden to be a spouse of His if only because He is inherently difficult. It is not a task for those who do not know or understand Him in an intimate way and that is inherently difficult due to who He is compared to all other Deities.

Loki requires a complete unburdening of your life to fit Him within it. This means that marriages or relationships with humans tend to fall by the wayside. This means that anything you do that occupies time and energy may be lessened to fit Him within it.

If you think about it, it’s like having a hole that is filled with cement or brick rather than mud or putty. It is like making room for a tractor trailer rather than a sport sedan. Loki is enormous and He takes up room and space. He isn’t a side dish once you are married, He is the whole four course meal including dessert.

Loki normally seeks attention from His devotees, but when He is married, it ceases becoming a request and rather an expectation. It impacts a lot more than your spiritual life, but your physical, emotional, and mental state as well. That is why it is an adjustment and upheaval and is more commonly made with people who are already aligned with Him and understand Him innately. For further justification, when you are aligned, you are already inclined to know Him like you know yourself, and when you are not, it is like getting to know a stranger. It makes this process easier and less traumatizing than if you aren’t aligned.

That sort of alignment doesn’t happen all at once but rather something that is created over the span of lifetimes. If you are not properly aligned, there will be no marriage because you can’t truly be in complete unification with the Deity who is intended. It is rare that Loki should want this with anyone because of the level of intimacy He requires. It is rare for any Deity to want this with a human, regardless, not just Loki.

At the end of the day, marriage is a choice and a partnership. Neither of these things can happen without the tools of building that intimacy with a Deity.

What I’m not saying

This does not mean that all romantic, courting, or sexual intimacy must be eradicated with Loki. Just because you are not in alignment with Loki does not mean you have to not have sex or intimacy or not have a devoted relationship. It means that it will look differently than if you did. It is perhaps an easier way to go about things – marriage isn’t for everyone.

Most of His people He often wants to have intimacy with in general. It doesn’t need to be explicitly sexual but it can be emotional and physical in all sorts of ways. He is an intimate Deity and He impacts people in such a way that intimacy is necessary to do meaningful work alongside Him. If you ignore that aspect of Him, you will likely be more apt to assuming the worst of Him. If you don’t ignore it, you will thrive.

Due to His nature, He will mirror what you expect Him to be rather than what is true. The more assumptions you put over Him, the more cost there is to your relationship. The less you find yourself making such assumptions means you are less vulnerable to this kind of deceit and error.

Trust is a value He desires from most people He wants as His own. That trust is not built on human constructs or desires, but rather His own dedication He feels to His people. He will see it through to the end if you allow Him to.

Whatever relationship you find yourself in, it is not a moral failure to not be considered for marriage. In fact, it is more likely than not that you are cut out for it and that is okay. This is not something that should be considered a “goal.”

People find this concept and believe it is something it is not. It is not the only way to find build intimacy with Loki.

Loki will show you Himself exactly what He wants. It will most likely not be marriage. It will be something that is deeply sustainable, effective, and meaningful. It will not have a label on it because it is freeing and consensual to not. It won’t be because He is trying to take advantage of your moral standards and emotions. He won’t try to make use of His ability to be a “fuck boy.”

Any intimacy with Loki is a deeply fulfilling experience. It enriches the core of our essence as humans. It builds an understanding of our lives that few Deities are capable of showing. Marriage is not the only way to that and it will likely never be the answer for most. It is not because you are incapable of having that sort of relationship with Him. It is because it is not defined in the way us in the West think it must be.